on my desk i have a songoram that was taken five months to the day i was born.
i don’t know where my head and toes are when i look at it, but i’ll just stare at that photo forever and ever. that’s me— in twenty-two weeks, on october second that year, my life would start. i’d meet my family and see arcadia with all its orange trees for the first time. i’d learn how magical swimming is, how fun it is to cook. i’d also learn about the bad stuff, the pain and everything, but being able to trace back my individual existence to a single day is just mind-blowing.
i like to think my own actual day of birth was fun for everybody. i know my dad, normally a steady guy, was pretty on edge because i was a little blue at birth and my mom obviously had a lot going on, but the chaos must’ve been exhilarating— a whole new person was entering the world! somebody who could be anybody! i came out of the womb and my parents didn’t know who they were looking at, what strange little thoughts and opinons i’d be having soon! how fascinating!
(disclaimer: for all my love of birthdays, i do not remember my brother’s birth at all. my sole memory of his coming into existence was having to switch rooms.)
the greatest thing, though, is when it’s someone else’s birthday. you get the entire day to talk about why you love them and they can’t shut you up! you get to buy them thoughtful presents to communicate why you care about them so!
it’s really the one day you have to explain to this person that they’re the only one of them in the whole wide world and they ended up in your life and that’s kind of a miracle and something has to be done to celebrate immediately.
the whole deal makes me so happy. you go into town, pick out a cool lil box and some wrapping and string, spend hours deliberating over what color scheme will match their energy and what collection of presents will be the best. you have an excuse to make a scene about somebody who’s a big deal to you.
you ever throw a surprise party? best thing ever. i snuck into a teacher’s classroom once and me and my friends decorated the whole classroom; we put string on the top of the doorframe and this poor exhausted six foot five guy walked into streamers at six thirty in the morning. and yet all of us loved him so much and the party that day in class was fantastic, and he got to see how much he meant to us, so i think it was worth it— he kept the decorations up for months (not the streamers though).
sometimes you get someone a gift they’ve really wanted and you think is really cool too and it’s such a shared high— i remember last november i got one of my pals a rare paul mccartney record and i was reminded of how great he is and how amazing it is that we’re friends and how incredible music is. you’re just overwhelmed with gratitude and joy and absolute love for this person in your life.
you’re reminded, too, of what they bring to your life. that same friend has introduced me to so many movies and books; he showed me la and is so enamored with the city and made me fall in love with it too. and so every november eighth, i get to thank him for all of that.
it’s also interesting to consider who shares your birthday, to compare personalities and lifestyles and ways of thinking and being. i identify deeply with my birthday buddy, graham greene, and how he looked at the world. moreover, me and gandhi both like peace, groucho marx and i both appreciate absurdity.
a lot of people whose work i love— buster keaton, norm macdonald— also have birthdays close to mine, and to have these points of comparison is fascinating for me. what can i learn from them? how do these people who may be like me navigate the world?
similarly, what does that tell me about other people? my best friend shares a birthday with fidel castro, and that’s proved instructive. i just hang back and let ennis do his thing, and ennis knows to let me daydream. a symbiosis between a summer and autumn baby, despite our differences.
all in all, though, people are the most intriguing, beautiful thing on the planet and any insight into their mysteries is worth exploring. birthdays, i think, may play a part in understanding all their idiosyncracies and loveliness.
and even if they don’t, they’re a reason to let someone know you love ‘em.
I hit refresh 15 times.
Happy near birthday Rose.